Sad

A childhood friend of mine, lost her brother last night. Heather has been a great friend of mine, for years and I know her whole family. Steve, was once a drug addict but had straightened his life around over the last few years. An accomplishment in itself. He had children, a new wife and family who loved him.

My heart aches for my friend Heather....I know the pain of loosing a sibling.

My heart aches for his children...I know the pain of loosing of a parent.

My heart BREAKS for his Mom. She is an amazing woman whom I love as much as I love Heather.
I can't imagine the pain she feels today. I will keep his family in my thoughts today, even though I
wasn't close to Steve....or his kids.....and I weep for the loss his sister and his mother feel.

So much

Do you ever get the feeling of being in quick sand...fighting every little move you make, trying not to get yourself lost in the sand abyss? While I am taking care of my husband, I am keeping up with the housework and laundry...I have a million little things to do! They seem to be multiplying...and I have no idea where to start. Things like reading the stack of magazines that is constantly growing, figuring out the navigation system on my car, logging photos and CD's into my sick little organized world, I desperately need to clean out our file cabinet and trying to figure out a way to put all the crap from my scrap room in a much, much smaller space...without it looking like a tornado hit it...so that Sara can move back home into her old room.

Did I forget to tell you that she is coming home. She has informed her boyfriend that she wants to come back home...that she wants to continue her education and she can't do that living with him. (HUZZAH!) Thank the Lord! So, I am using a corner of the master bedroom for my new scrap area and I have no idea how I am going to cram all of my stuff into a smaller space. Plus Tim Holtz (who is a creative God) is going to be releasing a crap ton of new stuff....I GOTTA HAVE! I am feeling overwhelmed....phewf!

I will get it done, chipping away at it ever so slowly. Dwen is always medicated and drifts in and out so that time helps since I don't want to disturb him. I haven't seen my best friends in what seems like weeks and I should never go out into public with my hair looking like this.....~sigh~

I am staying positive! I can do amazing things! I am woman...hear me whine!

Saying good-bye

A while back I wrote a blog page about my friend, Cherie. Cher has been in her wheelchair for about 15 years. She was in an auto accident and broke her back and severed her spinal cord. She has a very positive attitude and doesn't get down or depressed....see link above....however, today was a very tough day for my sister. She had to put her chocolate lab, Mocha, down. Mocha was a beautiful lady. She wasn't a service dog...(she never went to school)....but she was Cher's service dog, her daily companion and her best friend. I worked for Cherie for about 5 years...and Mocha greeted me everyday, gave me kisses and loved me and my kids as if we were her family. I am crushed by the news I recieved this morning...so I can only imagine the pain my dear friend is feeling. There are no words to comfort her. I know in my heart that Mocha is happy and is no longer in pain....she is running around with my boy Franky. Like they did...days ago. We will never forget you girl! We love you!

Bitch fest 09'

Buckle up...this is a long, bumpy ride! Please keep your hands and feet inside the vehicle until the ride comes to a full and complete stop!

So, in my last post I talked about how it would be cool to go to the zoo with all my siblings in tow....yeah, so it's not going to happen, one brother has canceled.....the other brothers' wife is on call...(don't know why he can't come by himself).

My niece who lived with us for a while announced today that the boy who broke her heart and tore her to shreds, belittled her and left her with absolutely nothing, is back in the picture. My daughter is on a see-saw with her boyfriend. I never see my son, thanks to his new relationship with the devil girl.

I'm on strike from mowing my lawn....(I'm sure the neighbors are loving me)....because there are 2 people who live in this hotel of a home, who can mow too....neither of these male members want to do it so why should I? I have a 10 day break/vacation coming up, and I seem to have filled all my time working on all the crap that needs to be done around this house.

My cell phone battery is damn near dead and I buy a new one from the retard sales people...and they sold me the wrong one!

To top it all off, I got a zit on my chin the size of Texas! I wanna know at what age this shit stops? They said once you are in your 20's...then your 30's....well, damn it, I'm 42 freakin' years old with a boulder size zit! Life is freakin' sweet!

BLAH!

The weather has been absolutely gorgeous here! I'm trapped inside with Luke. Blah!

Sara has moved her stuff and is happily living in her own place! I have the aftermath to clean up! Blah!

Adam is doing well with school and work! He is hanging out with the devil girl again! Blah!

Stuff...

So, I got a lot on my mind. Prepare yourselves...for the babbling that is about to happen. My tummy hurts, Wendy's onions do not agree with me! Spray on ice (for windows to make them look all frosty) sucks! Still worried about the damn cards! All done shopping except for Dwen...he is mega hard to buy for...spoiled ass boy! Bad things have been happening all around me...my nephews car is broken and will cost a ton to fix...money they don't have, plus they only have one car between them. My daughter went out on a date last night with a boy from work, not sure how I feel about this one..... he has already fathered a child....he best be good to my angel! I don't wanna have to kill him and go to jail. I start baby sitting my great nephew as of next Monday and I'm a little scared. Haven't been in charge of a tiny tot in years. I am worried about some good friends of mine. Can't figure out why my sister is pissed at me, but I haven't seen her in years so I don't know why it bothers me. I miss my Franky, he was a good dog and the other day was his birthday...hell, just typing that sentence made me tear up! Do you think the winter blues could be stetting in already? I am usually a happy-go-lucky kind of girl.....I hope it don't last long! Sorry to bring y'all down. Merry Christmas!

Family Drama...who needs it!

So, I had some issues on Sunday and Monday with a little family drama. While I could pour my heart out here...I won't . Let just say, that my 17 almost 18 year old son is in 'love' with a girl his Momma doesn't care much for (truthfully, NOT AT ALL!!!!). This leads to shucking his responsibilities around the house like doing his laundry. We talked and even wrote out the rules, just so there are no misunderstandings and all will be well with the world...for at least 2 days. I went downtown and painted my husbands office. Made a little cash to buy his Christmas gifts...so that is cool. However, the job was much bigger then he said it was and I ended up spending two days there, which has thrown all of my weekly plans off schedule. Yes, I keep my shit on a schedule...so now I will have to rush....oh vey! Found out that 2 of my 5 siblings won't be at Thanksgiving....this is no surprise. I also found out that the same 2 siblings won't be joining us for Christmas either. So, who know when I will see them. Sadly enough one of then lives 15 minutes from me! Dwen and I will start Christmas shopping this weekend. We have no idea what to get the kids. When you don't know what to get your own children....then they are too spoiled!!!!! I do avoid the stores on Friday! Big Time! I will get on line on Monday for Cyber Monday! Hells yeah!